I’ve finally decided to write something in the “About” section. I’ve decided that hiding some insignificant aspects of myself is not worth it. I still won’t be using my real name on this blog or the story for my own sake.
This pseudonym gives me the opportunity to write about things I’m normally not able to talk about otherwise.
Time for some boring facts.
- I live in Scandinavia.
- I’m a 27 years old hobbyist writer.
- I’m a pansexual genderqueer.
- I’m a female at birth/designed female at birth.
Time for some explaining for the boring facts.
- I live in one of the three countries in Scandinavia. All three countries are awesome.
- I discovered my passion for writing and photography in my teenage years. It was a couple of years later that I wanted to combine both as a way to make a living off of it but that is still nothing but a wish.
- I like who I like regardless of sex and gender . It’s the eyes, the smile and the personality.
- I don’t mind my given gender at birth but I don’t feel comfortable with it either.
I don’t feel comfortable with the feminine traits it has given me. It makes me anxious because society seem to think I should dress, act and think differently than what I do. It makes me feel caged.
I don’t feel the need to change my gender but I want less visible physical traits. I want to feel comfortable in my own body without constantly wishing everything about it was different. I want to look neutral physically.
I’m the person who can’t stand wearing a dress or high heels and I don’t particularly feel the need to wear makeup. Not only does it make it nearly impossible for me to walk. It’s painful. Wearing a dress makes me feel awkward. I never seem to be able to relax. I just count down the minutes or hours until I can get out of it. Why do wear a dress then? Because I’m expected to dress that way in certain family and by the end of this year I plan to change it. I won’t be wearing something I don’t feel comfortable in.
I don’t feel comfortable looking feminine. I’d rather look masculine if neutral is no choice.
Done with boring facts for now.
Basically, I’m just me.
This is a safe haven for me, a way for me to express what I feel and what I think without hiding behind a mask.